It's Hard Sometimes

Hello everyone, I just wanted to take this moment to just exhale a little bit. Criticize me if you want to but that's okay. At this very moment I am at Methodist Hospital in the dialysis center receiving treatment for dialysis. I was diagnosed with kidney disease or (ESRD) about eight and half years ago from complications of high blood pressure. Basically my high blood pressure caused my kidney disease or rather should I say that my lack of controlling my high blood pressure caused me to develop kidney disease. At that time I didn't have a clue that high blood pressure could cause kidney disease. I had heard about stroke and heart attacks from high blood pressure but not kidney disease. Initially when I first started blogging on this topic I thought about trying to complain about my situation and how it's hard sometimes even as a Christian man to stay motivated and positive. You see I have been dealing with a lot of health problems for a long time even after I had my transplant and thus here I am back on dialysis for a second time.

I must say that hearing that I would have to go back on dialysis was deeply depressing. I'm not sure how many of you know what dialysis is or not but just to sum it up you basically are hooked up to a machine that is cleansing your blood and taking off excess fluids in your body. You are hooked to this machine for about  three to four hours sometimes more depending on the individual, for three times a week. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful to God that there is this technology that allows us the opportunity to live. Without dialysis people with End Stage renal disease would eventually die. The fluids in your body are like toxins if not removed through either natural means such as urination or dialysis. But at any rate I have accepted the fact that I have to go back on dialysis, seeing  as the alternative is death...lol. What a motivator. It just seems like when ever I try to get a head there's something that always comes up to keep you down. I am a father of four boys and a husband and it is quite difficult trying to live just off disability alone. It seems like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. I keep thinking and wondering and praying when will it be my season of good fortune. And for all my critics and Christians out there who say just trust in the Lord...I've always trusted in the Lord and I will never stop doing that. But I'm also being real...We say we trust in the Lord all the time but we still have worry in our hearts. If that's not your testimony then good for you and praise God. But when you're in the thick of it and the manifestations are not happening right away, yes it's hard sometimes to stay motivated and positive.

I will admit that along the way I could have gotten off track because of discouragement. But that's the time you have to encourage yourself in the Lord.  People all I'm saying is take care yourselves. Get your check ups and make sure your blood pressure is under control.  Spend quality time with your loved ones and don't take your days for granted. Love on your children and enjoy them in their youth because I promise you the time is moving so fast and our children are growing up right  before our eyes. Soon they will be gone and starting their own lives and families. Our lives are precious and we only have one life to live. We should be mindful of how we live that life because our time here on this earth is short. I know this blog may sound conflicting and that's okay, because it paints a true picture of the emotional roller coaster ride that I deal with everyday.  It takes work to stay positive and try to live a life of purpose. I'm trying to find mind and possibly help someone else in the process. So pray for me as I will pray for you. I pray that the latter will be greater than my past. God bless you all...

Blackened Shrimp & Crawfish Fondue

Have you ever eaten that wonderful appetizer at Pappadeaux's called the Blackened Oyster and Shrimp fondue? It is very good and quite expensive. I believe it will set you back at least 14.95 here in Texas. But I have managed to come across a recipe that I promise you is its exact clone. Well minus the scallops. I'm not a real big fan of scallops so I've put my own little spin on it, but I promise you will love this dish and you can indulge yourself as much as you like when you make it at home for yourself. It's really not that hard and you will be glad you took the effort to do so. The ingredients are easily found at your local Walmart Superstore. Even the crawfish can be bought in the seafood section of the store.

If you've had this dish before you know what I'm talking about. Don't forget the garlic bread. OMG!!! Can't you taste it already. For those of you who haven't tried it or seen it, go to Pappadeaux's and order it and after you have tried it come back to this recipe and make it at home. Then come back to this site and tell everyone how wonderful it is and how it's tastes the same as it did when you had it at the restaurant. If it doesn't turn our right, it's probably user error...lol. I pride myself in the ability to mimick alot of my favorite dishes from the restaurants I eat out at because I can't afford to eat out all the time with a family of six...Just check out the recipe and let me know what you think.

Blackened Shrimp & Crawfish Fondue


Ingredients

• Sauce; (recipe follows)
• 1 package of Shrimp; peeled & deveined
• Blackened Seasonings
• 6 tbs Melted Butter
• 1 cup Baby Spinach
• 2 cups of Baby bella Mushrooms; sliced
• 12 oz Crawfish Tails
• 1 cup Chopped Green Onion
• 8 oz Monteray Jack cheese;
• 4 oz Bacon bits
• Garlic Bread

SAUCE
• 6 tbs Butter
• 4 tbs Flour
• 1 Onion; chopped
• 2 cup Shrimp stock or water
• 1 cup White wine {Menage a trois}
• 1 pinch Cayenne pepper
• 1 tbs Kosher Salt
• 2 cup Heavy Whipping cream

Preparation

Melt butter in a saucepan; whisk in flour and chopped onion. Cook over medium heat until onion is tender. Slowly stir in stock and wine; whisk until smooth. Add cayenne & salt; simmer 10 minutes. Add cream; simmer 5 minutes. Remove from heat & set aside. Season shrimp with blackened seasonings. Melt butter in hot saute pan. Saute shrimp about 2 minutes per side. Add spinach, mushrooms, crawfish tails, bacon bits and green onion. Saute until mushrooms & green onion soften. Fold in sauce, and bring to a simmer. Pour in heatproof dish; top with cheese. Place under a broiler until cheese melts. Use garlic bread pieces as dippers.

Mother’s Day

Mother's Day is Sunday May 9, 2010 and I wanted to take this opportunity to encourage everyone to spend some quality time with your mother. Throughout the years my family and I have always celebrated Mother's Day. We typically call up the family members and the planning begins. In my family my maternal grandmother is the matriarch and all things begin and end with her. It is very important for her, for all of her children to come together on Mother's day and celebrate. This is known and understood very well by all the members of the family. With that being said my grandmother has a total of five children who have their own individual families as well. So we have a pretty descent gathering of people that come together. So now we have to decide whose house will host the gathering, who's going to cook and what will you bring? What time will we meet and for how long. I'm sure there are many households out there with similar traditions and that is great. It's a wonderful time to honor and give back the much deserved love and appreciation that all mothers out there deserve and probably a lot more. Mothers are truly a precious commodity and we should thank God everyday for our mothers. I could take this moment to talk about how wonderful my mother is and how great my grandmother is but that's something I try to show in the way that I treat and interact with them on a daily basis rather than just saying the words. Yes, saying the words are important too, let's face it, who doesn't like to be praised. Glory to God!!

But at the same time we should understand that Mother's day is really every day. No matter how old we get as their children, we never stop needing our mother. Mother's all over the world have sacrificed so much for their children and in some cases their lives to make sure that the needs of their children are met. That's why Mother's Day is a special celebration and we make a big deal out of it. By now I'm sure you're probably saying get to the point. The point I want to make is this. Mother's day is a wonderful celebration but we should keep in mind that not everyone gets to celebrate with their mother on Mother's day. So I want to speak directly to that individual who's mother that may be deceased, or that individual who never knew their mother. There are some of you out there who were raised by your grandmother, Nana, or Big Mamma, whatever your situation or circumstance, this could be either a happy occasion for you or a harsh reminder that your mother is no longer with you. You might say what gives you the right to speak on such a thing. Please understand that I certainly don't mean any disrespect to anyone out there that has lost their mother or those who are not in contact with their mothers. I only come from my own perspective in this regard.

My wife lost her mother to breast cancer before we were married some many years ago and I never had the opportunity to meet my mother-in-law. I have only had the pleasure of getting to know her vicariously through my wife and my wife's sisters' memories and stories of her. And they paint a picture of a very strong woman, a proud woman, a woman of virtue, and a woman that didn't take any mess off of any body. I can see the product of her fruit in my wife. Even though my wife's mother has passed some time ago, the pain that she feels from her absence is ever present. And on days like Mother's Day that pain is magnified. Early in our marriage I would feel helpless and bewildered and there weren't any words that I could say or thing that I could do to make her feel better or make her pain go away. So recently I sat down with my wife and I questioned her about how she was feeling with Mother's day being right around the corner and she said that she had mixed emotions. So I asked her to explain some of the feelings she has and has had over time and this is some of the things she said to me.

Mona: "Some of the years are harder than others. There are times when I feel resentment towards other people who have their mom around and yet they don't treat their mothers with the proper respect, but more or less disrespect, not realizing the beauty and the blessing of being able to see their mom when they want to, to call their mom up on the phone and ask her for some advice, to give their mom a hug when they are feeling down, to be able to seek the wisdom of their mom when I as a mother myself I need help with my own kids. Having my mother around to go shopping or spend our last little bit of money to share a meal together. Then that resentment turns to anger, especially towards individuals who lack sensitivity because they can't truly grasp and understand the loss of a mother. It's hard sometimes to be happy for people who stand up and proudly go on about the generations and generations of their mothers that are still around. And that's when I start to pray and thank God for the time he gave me with my mom. I am thankful and grateful to God for allowing me the chance at motherhood. I take this time also to visit my mother's grave site and that helps to minimize the pain. I also realize that I am truly blessed to have my own children because I know there are women out there who want kids and can't have them. All these things help to get me through Mother's day. I also want to acknowledge that I'm also grateful to God for my Step-Mom she is a wonderful woman and I love her. No she can't replace my mom, no one can but she is the best step mom that I could have and I am blessed to have her. I also have a wonderful mother-in-law who I love dearly and with a great duo of step mom and mother-in-law I am able to honor and celebrate them on Mother's day. So to all the mothers, mother-in-laws, step-moms, Big Mammas and even mother figures, I say thank you and God Bless you!"

 

I really don't think there's nothing more that I could add to that. Just to encourage everyone to be mindful of the celebration of Mother's day. Honor your mother's in the right way, you never know when she's going to be called home. So give her the flowers she deserves while she can still smell them. Be thankful for your mother today and every day. Thanks for taking the time to share this personal testimony with me and my wife. And Mona, baby I love you, thank you for opening up your heart and keeping it real. I hope this was able to be a blessing to someone.

New to blogging

Hello everyone my name is Lee and this is a very new and exciting experience for me. I have never created a blog before and have just recently read a few of my own. Yeah I know I'm behind the curve and blogging is probably considered old news now. But just call me slow. I'm the type of guy who watches an old show that has been canceled after 2 or 3 years of being on the air and watching it in it's rerun production thinking this is a new show and it's the greatest show ever lol. But at any rate it is what it is. I'm not sure how the whole blog thing works at this point that's why I'm creating this intro page just to test it out. If all goes well and I am successful in creating this blog, you can look forward to more from me in the future. My blogs will include things that I am passionate about, things that are of concern to me, and things that I just want to share at that particular moment. So I hope you will come back and read more and feel free to give me your feedback. Last but not least, please note that I have additional pages on this site. Just click on the tabs above for the about me section, recipes, and family resource page. This site is still under construction so bear with me for the moment as I continue to make this site better.  Until then have a great day and I look forward to blogging more in the future.